Today is 1 week since my last Tysabri... or my first Tysabri infusion. And I feel great. I am walking really well.
And I still have tremors, my neck shaking, but I... it's so funny because I don't know what it looks like because, like, I'll look in the mirror because I want to see what my neck looks like and my tremors look like. But I can't tell because I look, and my neck is shaking. So I don't know what it looks like. But I feel really good, and I'm still keeping a really positive attitude, and I know that has alot to do with the fact that I'm doing so well.
I called my family friend Debbie, who has MS, because I had a question. I am not sleeping. Like right now, it's a little
after 6:00 at night, and I woke up at 3:00 in the morning, and I haven't slept since. So I've been up this whole time, but I'm,
like, bright eyed and bushy tailed, like, raring to go. And I, you know, cleaned my bedroom. My dad and I went to visit my
friend Chris Ewing [SP]. He's doing some film stuff for me right now. I'm editing some videos together for my family for
Thanksgiving. And I was wide awake, and I baked him cookies as a thank you. And then my dad and I went to the grocery store, and we just made a pot of chili. So I feel great. I'm doing really well. Anyway, I called Debbie, and I asked her... I said, "Debbie, how
long were you, like, high off of the steroids?" And she said, "a
little while." And I said, "Because I'm, like, moving nonstop. I
am doing so many things. But it's great. I'm getting so much
done, and my mind is so clear."
And she said, "Don't worry, Lauren." She said, "The last time
that I was on steroids, I re-wallpapered the bathroom." And I
thought that was so funny because everybody laughs at me. You
know, I wake up so early, so when everybody else gets up, I'm,
like, Okay, listen to what I thought of this morning. And
they're like, let me have my coffee first. Because I've already
been up for, like, three hours.
But Debbie, she said that the same thing happened to her. So
beware, the steroids make you feel like you're on... I don't
know what makes you do that... what, cocaine or whatever. I
don't do drugs, so I don't know. But, anyway, I also had an
appointment with my family doctor, Dr. George Costea, who I
love, and he was so wonderful in the hospital. So, anyway, I had an appointment
with him, a follow-up appointment, and it went great. It went
really well, and we walked in, and he said, "How are you doing?
Are you walking?" And I was, like, yeah, watch, and I jumped up
and walked all over his office, and he checked on my vitals.
And everything is great except for my tremors. But they'll just
go away. It's scary because some people, like, in the hospital,
some of the nurses that were checking on me, they had never seen
someone with tremors. And then others, the nurse that gave me my
Tysabri infusion, she knew about it, and she said, "Just be
patient. They'll go away." It's easy to tell somebody that. You
know, it's really annoying, but things could be a lot worse,
they could, and I know that.
But it's not easy. My writing is still really terrible, really
shaky. And I can't read because my head is shaking, and so when
I look at the book, the words get all jumbled, and it's
frustrating. But I can lay on the couch really well, so that's
kind of what I've been doing.
And I wanted to go on the elliptical today because I was feeling
so great, but a physical therapist came this morning, and she
had me do some exercises, like, with a ball and weights and
stuff. And I was sweating a little bit . . . a little bit . . .
definitely not satisfying. But I thought, I don't want to push
it because then I'll be so tired, and it'll ruin my day.
But, anyway... oh, I know what I was going to say about Dr.
Costea. I told him... he's my family physician. And then my
neurologist is Dr. Paul Cullis, and I love them so much because
they're both very kind, sensitive, caring people. And, like,
being sensitive is important to me because I'm really sensitive.
And so I told Dr. Costea, I said, you know, most people don't
like going to the doctor except I love going to see my doctors
because I love my doctors. And it really does make a difference
because it makes the appointments more enjoyable. And Dr. Costea
is actually a family friend. He grew up with my dad, so I know
his family.
But Dr. Cullis, I joke with him all the time, and it makes my
appointments fun, you know. So I can't stress it enough about
being positive because I guarantee that it is helping me do
well. And I've always been a really happy, positive person.
That's just how I am. That's my personality. But I'm really
working hard. You know, I'm praying every day and working hard
at being really positive, and I think it's helping me. I'm doing
really well. My voice, I'm sure you can hear, is still kind of
shaky, and my head is shaky. But I'm walking. I'm walking really
well, and I can . . . I feel like I'm normal again. So that's
good.
I had another person, I went to Blockbuster the other night with
Anthony, and we went up to the counter to check out. And another
person, she said, "Oh, are you cold?" And obviously it's from my
shaking. You know, people, when they're cold or whatever. But,
you know, I looked at Anthony and rolled my eyes, and I was
like, yeah, it's cold outside, you know. But, oh well, it'll go
away... hopefully sooner rather than later. But that's life.
There's nothing I can do but be patient.
